Comparison: The Thief of all Joy

Comparison: The Thief of Joy. 

The first time I heard this was last summer, Andy Dononhoe, a photographer and friend and I had been talking about the VIA Criterium he and others had been shooting and they knocked out some insane images and I felt mine weren’t good enough. Now I like photography and I like taking pictures, the whole process but not for one second do I think Ii’m anything more than an “Instagramer”. I find photography a nice distraction away from cycling sometimes. I wanted to use The Crit to see if I could take race images, I’d never done it before. I like taking photos of people and trying to capture a moment or emotion. I found this incredibly intimidating and in the end didn’t really share or publish the images I took.

It's January, a new year. That time of year where we look forward, set new goals and try to improve ourselves. Why?

We’re  bombarded by apps like Instagram and even Strava showing us people living their best lives, hitting annual cycling goals, riding 20,000 kms or more, having the latest fastest kit or bike and it's easy to look at that and then look inwards and feel deflated, like you’ve failed or let yourself down. But you haven’t.

I am more comfortable with where I am at the moment, more than ever. Taking a break from social media really helped last year. I rediscovered my riding mojo and took photos for myself or work. 2023  I rode just shy of 10,000 km which is less than half of what I used to but my life’s different now. I have a full time job and people in my life who are more important than cycling. I can genuinely say that most of those kms were quality, the kind of kms I enjoy and not filled with riding because I need to hit some bullshit arbitrary goal. I don't need to do anything anymore. Need saps the fun out of life and comparing myself to others or numbers when i was guiding everyday robs me of any joy. I can look at people's social media and like what I actually like, if a post makes me laugh or is a great image or a cool product, the less curated the better I'll hit that like button. I also think and hope the influencer industry is on its way out, genuine creatives, talent and storytellers will hopefully return, marketing budgets aren’t what they once were and maybe even people are bored of it all as well, so a return to seeing friends posts, holiday snaps instead of paid posts keeping us hooked and envious wouldn’t be a bad thing.

Another friend Ketil wrote something similar exactly two years ago, you can read it HERE.

I hope if you’ve taken the time to read this then hopefully you’ve also read some of my previous posts, the last two in particular. Insulating myself has made me a much better and healthier person. The not giving giving a fuck isnt about being ambivalent and not caring, its about choosing what to give a fuck about and what’s important and riding 20,000 kms or being 65 kgs or how many people like my images which an algorithm decides who sees just aren’t  important to me anymore. 

I’m doing things for myself, cycling and photography should be enjoyable and if at any point I’m not enjoying them I’ll take a break. The same goes for social media and even this. I’m writing this because Iike doing it. I used to do it as it helped me get stuff off my chest, it was a release but it wasn’t healthy. Now it and I am.  Now I don’t compare myself to others and what the apps want me to see and it feels good.

My only goal this year is to continue to feel how I am right now. I think the above gives me the tools and shows the way how.

A few of my crit images below.

ANDY DONOHOE PHOTOGRAPHER https://www.andydonohoe.com/